And how was your mother’s day? Mine was lovely. I heard from the homegrown boys (Zach and Jimmy) talked to my mother and then the Baker boys took me to dinner – my choice – so I picked Frenchy’s on the beach – and after dinner the boys played in the ocean (I mean the Gulf, but it still looks like an ocean to me.)
I just sat in the chair on the beach and chillaxed…big time. We stayed for sunset and then home for ice cream. And then today I got a new jade tree from Jimmy in the mail.
How sweet is that boy? (yes Zachary, how sweet is that boy?) I understand he has sent a card too (yes Zachary, a card too.) Jimmy and I were reminiscing about walking in the Relay for Life event on Mother’s day in Oakland. He always hated getting up so early (who doesn’t?) but then loved the walk itself. That was a nice tradition, even though it was short-lived.
Then we would meet Zachary for brunch somewhere. Those were nice times. I’ve always been a little opposite in the mother’s day wishes department. Most mothers say they want a day off from their kids. I’ve always been a proponent of making my kids spend the day with me. I had hoped to continue that tradition down here with the new fam, but no such luck. Jorden is always up for a meal and whatever his dad does. But I wasn’t so lucky with the girl. She opted out to study. That’s the difference. My kids it was mandatory. Here they just say no. Dam kids.
In other news I feel like confessing today. I need to admit, I have a guilty pleasure. You know for some people it’s chocolate (but that seems too common and boring to fall into that category). I’m thinking it should be more like Ho-Ho’s or Burger King (for food items), or other types of guilty pleasures? How about foot rubs (like the kind you pay for?) or maybe something really kinky like porn? Anyway, my guilty pleasure is that I like to go to Psychics. I always have. My mom got me started actually. From an early age we went to astrologers. Then she treated my sister and I to a “dream” class taught to us by a woman who was an astrologer/psychic and well it’s like a habit for me now. According to some it’s also a sin. I can see both sides.
I think the reason I like it so much is because I have this obsession with wanting to know what is going to happen next. It is very rare that I’m happy with the way things are. And even if I am happy I always feel like something has to happen next and if nothing is happening fast enough for me well then I find myself drawn to these psychics to tell me what it is so that I can prepare. I will tell you that 90% of the psychics that I have gone to have been dead wrong. WRONG. So my entire life has been spent waiting for things to happen that never came to pass. That’s probably where the “sin” part comes in…maybe. I mean why waste your life waiting for something instead of focusing on what’s going on under your nose? There’s actually a funny movie about spending your life looking for what a fortune-teller says (Only You).
I’m sure the religions have more reasons why it’s wrong.
Me? I get frustrated, or I get bored, or I get stuck. Instead of spending thousands on a therapist to talk me thru why I’m stuck, bored or frustrated, I’ll spend $50 on a psychic. They may tell me complete bullshit but for a while it will calm me and I’ll think “ok, this is going to happen so don’t get anxious…” And then I have a lot of time to build up my tolerance for when it doesn’t happen.
Well anyway, why do I bring this up today? Because I treated myself today to a psychic. Phil and I both went to her before I actually moved down here. I got an email on Friday saying she was going to raise her rates starting in June and then as a surprise I got $50 in the mail so I thought it was Kismet and I should go.
So I spent $50 for a half hour. Although I ended up being there for an hour and a half. The most interesting thing to note of the day? She saw nothing. She said she was getting “nothing”. How about that? Well, not nothing. She did say since she wasn’t getting anything to “just keep doin what you’re doin.” (that’s my motto!!) She also said Phil and I would be together for good (something like that), both these kids would do fine, both would go to college, both are smart and are going to do good things. Oh and maybe we’ll start looking to buy a house next year. But for me personally? Nothing. She said that’s never happened to her before. I think it’s fascinating. I said “well either I’m going to die or there’s something else going on.” Since she mentioned being with Phil for 20+ years I don’t think I’m kicking the bucket, but for the first time with me going to one of these places I got nothing. Should I have saved the $50? No. Just sitting there chatting it up with her was relaxing. We sat outside on her deck and it was so peaceful. I ended up asking her how she got into the business, what her background is etc. I find what people do for work is really interesting. Like how do you end up where you end up? How does someone even become a psychic?
Even though there is no lottery winning in my future, no dream job (no job at all actually), no future so to speak I still had a lovely couple of hours sitting on the porch with my friend Caryl, who I met during our first week together down here when we were looking at houses. It’s been a year since our first meeting. She said back then that she saw me moving down (at the time of my visit it still wasn’t a done deal) and it would be fast. Those of you that remember my departure will agree. I gave a two-week notice to both work and friends and we hit the road. She got that right didn’t she?
Well anyway, that’s my confession for the day. Sometimes I keep going to others until I find someone who says something I want to hear, but today I feel satisfied with nothing.