Some of you may be wondering “what does she do all day”…I remember feeling like I had to justify my days when there were four of us, a dog and a house. Now there’s one of me, 400 sq ft of living space and several biting spiders. However do I manage?
Well I will tell you. I sleep in. I make food, and believe me when you’re trying to be healthy it takes effort. No more grabbing a cookie or two and heading out the door for Subway. Although yesterday, full disclosure, I stopped at Publix and got Sun Chips and cilantro hummus. It’s so much easier to eat on the run. So if it’s a making food day that takes up some time. Then of courses dishes take up time. I go through my emails looking for anything from a real person which on a typical day will be a big fat zero, but still it takes time to go through them. I get more calls now from friends and family then I used to. Noone called when I lived with the Bakers. I take that back. Jimmy still called about every day or so and my sister called. That’s about it. Now it’s picking back up with friends and family checking in. That takes up time and a welcome reconnection (that is not the word I want there but I can not think of it now).
And the job search. No I do not sit here all day looking at those stupid jobs. And here is why. Well, never mind I’m not going to tell you. But the truth is I get bombarded daily with so many emails with job links and they are typically duplicates or sometimes not even available anymore. So I scan through them looking for anything new. And sometimes I’ll get inspiration to look at a particular site to see if they have anything. Today, Zachary suggested CostCo. I know I applied to them when I was with the Bakers but it doesn’t hurt to try again so that’s where I applied today. Everyday I apply to at least one place. Am I knocking at doors? No. Applying online for jobs can be as easy as sending a resume or it can take more than an hour filling out their online application. It’s grueling. But I do it. I have to. There are jobs that I want but at this point it’s first come first serve baby.
I am writing. I am writing a lot. I finally got that spark of inspiration I was looking for since moving down here and I’m running with it. I have written in the middle of the night, by hand, in a journal (and typed the next day.) I mean when the words strike I have to write. I spend large parts of the day writing here at my little desk and I love it. I love that I feel like I’m on a mission and have a purpose. I’m doing research on Agents, ordering writing magazines, and I’ve joined this writers group that meets once a month. Unfortunately they are not meeting again until August but it’s a good group I think. You have to already be writing to be in it. So I don’t know, if anything it’ll remind me of my creative writing classes at Carlow.
I read, mostly God stuff. You know, inspirational readings to help me find and/or keep my Zen although yesterday I went to Stephanie’s for a good page turning book. She gave me a few. I haven’t started because I keep writing. I just never know when this dream existence is going to end so I am really taking advantage of it.
I typically go to sunset every night but have not been able to walk distances yet. I’m heading out tonight for the chiropractor as I really do think he will help. I hate my chiropractor though. I call them the Cult Chiropractors. I want them to just fix it. They want a lifetime commitment. I went to them before when I lived with the Bakers. Actually it was Philip who signed me up with them at a farmers market booth. Anyway they took all these xrays but they will only show them to you on Tuesday nights where you have to be with a group for a group discussion and then he’ll meet with you one on one. They wouldn’t meet with me before unless Philip came. He wouldn’t go. He wasn’t wrong to say no. So I never went back. It was more important for them to have Philip come than to heal me. I hate them. I really do. BUT if they can fix me with an adjustment or two then I’m going and I’m outta there. They have already lectured me on not coming back after I feel better. Why can’t their goal just be to have me feel better? If it hurts again I’ll come back. But I won’t go back, I will find another one. Why do I continue to go to them? Because I was desperate and I had their number. But now I will find someone closer to me. After tonight of course. After the group lecture like I’m 12. I mean I just really hate them.
And with that I have to eat and then hit the road because it will take more than an hour to get there in rush hour traffic and I will be so miserable thinking about the drive to get there and how much I hate them. That can’t be good for healing. Zachary told me today that complaining shortens your life span. Wait no it was complaining, what was it Zachary? Shortens your brain waves? Makes you dumber? I forget. Must make you forgetful. That must be it. I’m complaining and I can’t remember.
Ta ta for now,